Usually I don't post anything when I'm frustrated or say things that only come from frustration....but I can't help it this time, so here goes. Well as the tittle says, I've just closed and deleted the thread that went South, incase you don't know what I'm referring to I'm referring to the 'Post Pics of you and your Significant other!'. The thread started quite nice and the intentions were very good. Regrettably there are new members here that bring with them certain attitude. I'm all for new members but I will make this clear. Here at Detailing Bliss I personally uphold respect as my number one rule. Now for the most part I'm tolerant and I let lots of things go, I'm laid back and very relaxed. When it comes to 'moderating' the forum. To be perfectly honest, I'm not a fan of acting like the bad guy, but it seems from time to time I have to be. The purpose of this thread is to let new comers know what Detailing Bliss is all about. For those that have been around for a bit, know this already but a refresher is always good. I personally believe on communicating properly with one another, in a respectful manner. I usually don't mind some members swearing here and there but lately it seems that there are a bit too many 'wtf' comments being expressed. Like I said usually it doesn't really bother me but frankly I've had enough. Please communicate properly, when I say properly do it in a mature and respectful way. There is no need to use foul language, we all have a brain lets use it...and if you can't think of any better words then swearing then please don't post at all!!! I can edit every single post/thread, but I frankly I don't enjoy doing that...for several reasons but the main reason is, I'm not here to baby sit any one. We are all mature adults and most of all we are all capable of using our brains and being respectful and polite. Having said that, if you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything!!! It's really simple and when in doubt feel free to send me a PM sharing with me what your thinking of posting and I'll share with you my opinion. For the most part we are all capable of distinguishing between right and wrong, I don't enjoy baby sitting anyone here, nor do I enjoy sending PM's that look as though I'm your mom or dad...I really don't enjoy doing that. For the most part, I let all kinds of pictures be posted on the forum...my personal rule is this. If no one complains about the picture or gets offended by the picture then I'll let it be...but it seems that I may have been too relaxed. Detailing Bliss is not a porn site, Detailing Bliss is not about posting pictures of your girl friend or wife wearing skimpy outfits, that's your personal life and I would appreciate it if it could stay personal. So please don't post any pictures that are inappropriate. Now what is appropriate and what is not? Well when in doubt check with me! Just send me a PM with your picture and either say 'no please don't post that on the forum' or 'yes, go ahead and post that on the forum'. Some of you may be reading this thread and wonder, why is Nica so upset? Well it bothers me that such childish acts, communication or lack of it, goes on. I don't want to control every single member here, no that's not what I want. In fact, it's the opposite. I prefer to give all members freedom, freedom to do as they please, all I ask is be RESPECTFUL!!! Is that too much to ask? If you can't see your error then just stop and read what other members here are telling you, I realize it's human nature to block/get on the offensive when someone points out our flaws but like I said we are all mature adults here, get off the ignorant horse your riding and just listen to the members and you'll realize what an idiot your being! Detailing Bliss hardly has moderators, in fact there are only three. I say three because it's Calgarydetail, sneek and my self. DB Boss, is a good friend who helps once in a wile so I don't count him as a moderator. Now regrettably Calgarydetail and sneek are students and like all students they need to work and study. It's summer break but regardless I'm sure they are busy and they volunteer their time to help me out on the forum. I have thought about adding more moderators but frankly I don't want to. I feel that each member here is a moderator, every single member cares for the forum...well at least they should. So many members have said 'Detailing Bliss is the best', 'Detailing Bliss is my favorite forum'...bla..bla..bla....so you say that but you act like idiots at times!!! If you truly appreciate Detailing Bliss, if you truly think Detailing Bliss is the best well then treat it as such. I've always said and I'll continue on saying the forum's success is directly related to it's members! I don't make detailing a success, sure I had good friends help me out with the design, the look for the forum is unique, pleasant..bla..bla..bla...but to be perfectly honest Detailing Bliss is nothing but net space, it's the members that make it what it is, it's the members that will either make it something wonderful or turn it into garbage and another waist of net space!! Well for those that truly appreciate Detailing Bliss and for those that truly know how Detailing Bliss started and how it's ran and respect me and the forum I apologize for such rant....but frankly, it's very disappointing to see some members act they way they do, I can't help but shake my head. I'm truly disappointed...some of you may say 'wow Nica your being way to dramatic'. But to be honest, Detailing Bliss is a passion for me. I started Detailing Bliss so I could have a place to express my self freely with out any boundaries, having said that if the only way you express your self is by swearing and acting like an ass then regrettably Detailing Bliss is not meant for you and even though I don't like banning members it will be a pleasure to ban such members. Better yet, if you fit in the disrespectful, childish, ignorent category and you know this of your self or have been told this in the past please leave my forum and save me the hassle of banning you! If you can't respect Detailing Bliss, then you don't deserve my respect nor my time and most importantly you don't belong here!
I wholeheartedly agree. I'm the one who started that thread as a way to put some faces to names. And to add a little bit of personality to the comradery we have here. I'm sorry it spiraled out of control, and that people were being dumb. I didn't intend for it to be a place to show off your lady in skimpy clothes, or to bash people at all. We're all different people from different places with different genes. Once again, sorry that thread got out of hand -- I'll think again before posting something along those lines
lifemal, please don't feel as though I'm blaming you. No, not at all. You did nothing wrong, in fact I enjoyed your pictures, they were classy and showed good photograph skills. Not sure why I let that thread bother me so much..I haven't been this upset for a wile...:shead:...maybe it was the straw that broke the camels back or the drop of water that overflowed the glass...any who I'll deal with it.
Nica, this is a great thread. There has been an influx of new people lately and to be honest some are not DB type people. Like a few said on that thread lets keep it to detailing and the slang has to go. I hope the people that you pm'd get it and those who don't move on. Several of the orignal members like myself have been talking how some of the new people need to relax and leave the slang at home and not on the forum. I hope this forum goes back to the fun and cozy forum that it started out to be. Nica I am glad to see you put your foot down and reminded everyone just not the new people how it used to be and how it will go back to the way it was. Thanks for this great forum and lets all get back to detailing.
x2 This is why i like this forum. Please try and treat others like you would like to be treated. I've seen little things become gigantic things and turn a forum upside down. Be respectful, courteous and remember to be Bliss if you want to be part of this!!!
I love all of the detailing information on here, but I made that post on a slow day and wanted to get things going a bit -- oops! Nica -- I'm not really taking responsibilty/blame for it -- I just feel a little bad for starting it in the first place. I AM one of the new guys around here and I hope I'm not lumped in with the people you guys are talking about. I've been careful to tread lightly and not step on anyone toes. I'm still a bit wary of forums after years of taking abuse on car-related message boards, lol.
Well thank you all for the support...not sure if it's me being grumpy lately or what but I just had a kink in my back and well I'm glad to see it's not just me that has seen a shift on the forum. Even though I'm not that old or savvy as other members, I was raised up in a respectful family and was taught at an early age to respect others and their belongings, always be polite and courteous and most of all always lend a hand where ever possible. I do my best to lead by example, regrettably work has been very busy for me lately and so has detailing...not that I'm complaining I enjoy both my day job and detailing...but it bothers me to see things fall a part when I don't log in for a day or two, it shouldn't be this way...perhaps more mod support is needed...but I still believe the best mod support is the community...but like all well lubricated machinery it all needs an adjustment once in a wile.
Honestly you did nothing wrong and you shouldn't feel bad. I'll never let anyone take any kind of abuse on Detailing Biss, it will never happen and when it does happen I'll be right there to deal with it....it still amazes me how so much abuse is on forums or online for that matter. I consider that a lack of control or ownership. I care about Detailing Bliss and should it ever get out of control or abusive, I'll pull the plug and call it quits rather then let it get out of hand. Because I care about the forum and it's members so much I sometimes get too attached to it...but I can't help it, it comes with the job. New members don't need to tread lightly, they just need to be respectful and courteous! lifemal you have done both and I appreciate it and don't feel bad. I just don't want a few bad apples ruin it for the rest.
Well said Carlos. To be honest when I saw the thread title I didn't think it was a good idea for a topic. My second thoughts "Your just getting old (allright just old) and after all this is DB it will be fine... shame because it seems the original idea was innocent enough....
Well, I suppose I am 1 of the ones this was directed at. So I would like to appologize if I offended/hurt anyones feelings.I certainly did not join this site to become a trouble maker...I guess I just got sucked in, something about being called an Idiot tends to do that to Me. So again Please except my Sincere Apology to anyone I may have offended...:sorry:
Carlos I really enjoy DB and you need to do what you have to to keep this the number 1 detailing forum on the net.
Well said Carlos. Respect for others is paramount. I love this forum and appreciate the efforts you take to maintain order. Unfortunately ther are those bad seeds that rear there ugly head and need to be put back inline. As they have nothing better to do than to ruin things for others. Thanks again for a great to learn and meet others that share the same paasions. !!!!!!!!!
Well said, like the thread started a few days ago illustrated people come here for the sole purpose that DB is a respectful and humble place to talk about detailing and everything that encompasses it. Most people go to other forums and have to listen to bickering and complaints on them, some not all are that way. DB stands apart from these forums almost as a haven for decent people just looking to have fun while talking about detailing and sharing funny stories, nothing should ever get away from that, we are classy people, and like Nica said we are adults and we shouldn't have to be baby sat. Thanks Nica for the post!
Carlos, first I would like to thank you for closing that particular thread. I wish I could apologize for what I wrote but if I did I would be lying not only to you but everyone else as well. Did I take what was said personal? Absolutely! You see, I was raised to be a little more respectful not only to strangers but more importantly the folks that you "supposedly" care about. When I see/hear someone being out of line I will call them out on it. Think about it.....do you really think it's respectful to call you signifcant other a "hoe or any name" and to post somewhat explicit photo of the person you supposedly care about to a bunch of strangers? If you answer yes then your part of the reason why this society is so messed up today. I could go on and on but I have better things to do at work starting with learning more about about a hobby that I'm passionate about as well as spending more money shopping online....lol.
I'm glad you care so much for this forum as much as many others on here do too (me included). I'm on a bunch of different forums and this one has the most laid back and respectful members. I enjoy all the help everyone gives each other and glad I happen to stumble upon this place. BTW, I'll keep my language to a minimum. I know I wrote something the other day and it was adjusted/deleted
Carlos, thanks for posting this and for closing that thread. I wish that it would have not turned out that way as I thought it was a great idea from Ty to create that thread. It spiraled out of control so quickly though, which really put DB lower on the maturity level. I appreciate this forum so much because of the laid-back member base, mature attitudes and mannerisms, and generally everyone here is just so darn nice! Seeing things like that happen is expected on the other car forums I'm a member of, but not DB. Hopefully, we won't see anything like that happen for a long time, and it's a real shame that thread had to be closed. I wholeheartedly appreciate your passion for this community. Thanks, Dave
